


In Search of Brains

by wei



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, Humor, Zombies
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-09-11
Updated: 2011-09-11
Packaged: 2017-10-23 16:17:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/252339
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wei/pseuds/wei
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sasuke and Naruto learn a valuable lesson: don't annoy Ino when she's working.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Search of Brains

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the AU meme at naruto_meme. Prompt: In which Naruto is turned into a zombie and Sasuke tries to figure out a way to save him.

"Braaaains. Must have braaains," Naruto chanted. At first, Sasuke ignored Naruto looming above him to concentrate on the scroll he was reading, and then then Naruto didn't stop, he grumbled, "Stop bothering me, you idiot." Eventually, Sasuke grew tired of slapping Naruto's outstretched arms away, glanced up to check the position of the sun, and then teleported away.

A moment later, he returned with Sakura in tow. "Here, you wanted brains, have some brains," he told Naruto, pushing Sakura towards him.

"Sasuke! I just got off my shift. Do you have any idea how much I was looking forward to eating?" complained Sakura, turning around and waving a pair of chopsticks in his face.

Sasuke ignored her. "You're the medic. What's wrong with him?"

Sakura glared at him. "You're buying me a new lunch." She then turned back to Naruto and looked him over. She considered the glazed over eyes, the drool dripping out of his mouth, the arms held parallel to the ground, and the continual begging for brains and said, "Ask Ino. It's one of the jutsus she was developing." She then held out her hand, palm face up.

"I'm not buying you lunch until you fix him," said Sasuke. Sakura shrugged, grabbed his money pouch from his belt, and teleported away.

"Great. Idiot, what did you do to annoy Ino?" complained Sasuke after Sakura had left. He started walking towards the flower shop, after checking to make sure Naruto would follow him.

When he didn't find Ino at the shop, he tried her house, the training grounds, and all over town, until he gave up and decided to get his wallet back from Sakura at the hospital.

He found Sakura and Ino in the hospital cafeteria, chatting while sipping their milkshakes. "Oh there you are, Sasuke. Here, you can have your pouch back," said Sakura, handing over an empty bag to Sasuke.

Sasuke rolled his eyes at Sakura, and then demanded, "Ino, fix Naruto."

"As I was explaining to Sakura, Naruto interrupted me when I was working on a jutsu that makes the target subconsciously susceptible to audible cues given over the next 18 hours. After that time, the target will internalize those cues and act on them. " Ino paused to take a breath, but Sasuke interrupted her before she could start talking again.

"I don't care. Fix him before he drives me insane."

Ino shared a glance with Sakura. "Fine. You need to convince him that he's an intelligent person."

"Me," said Sasuke, in disbelief.

"Yes, you. It's your fault, after all," said Ino grinning.

Sasuke turned around to leave, without saying thank-you or goodbye. Ino narrowed her eyes at the slight and started making hand signs.

When Sasuke had found a place safe from eavesdroppers, he started trying to cure Naruto. It took a while, because he started off saying, "You're a very smart person. Especially when you when you are an hour late to team lunches because you misread the clock." Sasuke did grudgingly concede that some of the jutsus Naruto invented were creative (even if they sounded like an eight year old came up with the name) and was in the process of admitting that he did have a (bizarre and unaccountable) knack for understanding people and getting them to trust him when Naruto snapped out of the jutsu.

"Aww, Sasuke, I knew you really liked me all along!" Naruto exclaimed, tears collecting in his eyes.

"That was a joke. You're still an idiot, and I'm out of here." Sasuke started to walk away.

"Sasuke, you bastard! Come back here!" shouted Naruto. Sasuke ignored him, a satisfied smirk on his face. The contented feeling lasted until the next morning, when he woke up, and chanted "My parents were married when I was born."


End file.
